Getting to Know Me (a little more)

A continuation of this post:

  • I hate most vegetables. I have to trick myself to eat them by “hiding” them in my food. I really, really want to like the beautiful asparagus, radishes, etc. I see at the farmers market every week but I just can’t stand them. I could live on fruit alone, though. Unless it’s fuzzy (like a peach) – that totally freaks me out.
  • I’m too scared of commitment to get a tattoo but I’m always searching for the “perfect” one.
  • I can’t fall sleep if the closet door is open, even just a little bit.
  • I HATE being late. Even if I know the other person will be late I CANNOT STAND being late. This drives Mark nuts. If you say “let’s meet around 5” I will be there at 4:55. I can’t help it.
  • I love speaking to groups but only if I don’t know anyone very well. I can speak in front of huge groups and present at workshops but ask me to speak in front of 5 co-workers and I can’t do it.
  • When I was 8 or so I took a tap dance class and the girl next to me in the class line up smelled like BO. Every class I tried to change places but we were lined up by height and the teacher yelled at me. I begged to quit, complaining that the tapping gave me headaches. After several weeks of whining about my fake headaches my mom let me quit.
  • When I was in middle school and getting ready for braces I had something like 5 teeth pulled. My mouth was just too small and crowded so my teeth were on top of each other. Now, whenever I go to a new dentist they are baffled at how few teeth I have!

Random

The lovely and talented Karen over at Chookooloonks has been having a fun little share-fest with her readers in which she shares random facts about herself and her readers share theirs.  I’ve been commenting almost everyday and have assembled quite the little collection.  So, here are some fun and random facts about me:

  • I must have something over me when I sleep. Even if it’s just the corner of a sheet or a tiny baby blanket over my shoulder and arm, I can’t sleep without it. Somewhere in my childhood I convinced myself that if a psycho-killer broke in at night he couldn’t stab me through my sheet. And to this day I have to have something over some part of me.
  • I don’t understand women who refuse to learn how to use a lawn mower on “principle”. That irks me to no end. Same thing for refusing to learn how to change a tire.
  • My dream home has to be on the water – I don’t care if it’s a big lake or the ocean. It can’t just be near it, I have to be able to see the water and hear from my house. Someday…
  • For the longest time I couldn’t stand having anything between my toes – flip flops, toe rings, etc. Then a really cute pair of sandals called to me and I got over my “nothing between the toes” thing. I would wear flip-flops 24/7 if I could. I still can’t stand toe-rings, though.
  • I hate logos plastered all over things. I don’t care if the handbag is the perfect shape and price, if some damn logo is all over it then no way!
  • I have to sleep with a fan on. I cannot sleep in a silent room.
  • I often find myself having to hold back from jumping into water when on boats/bridges/etc. When we vacation in British Columbia’s Gulf Islands it’s hard for me to stand at the ferry railing as I fear I will take the plunge. I just love water and want to be in it.
  • I CANNOT stand karaoke and can’t for the life of me figure out how that is fun for either the singer or the listeners.
  • I tried to give up meat once and lasted for about 6 days.
  • My husband and I tried to take dance lessons to prepare for our first dance together at our wedding reception and failed miserably. We both fought each other for the lead. After 2 lessons our instructor (who was also a friend) gave up on us. Now, nearly 8 years later we’ve hardly ever danced together. I think we need to take lessons again – I hope we’d be better at sharing the lead now.
  • I have never broken a bone. I’ve hurt tendons and ligaments and have had ACL reconstruction but never a bone.
  • I can’t remember my first kiss.
  • I have had my tongue and navel pierced – in addition to several holes in each ear. Other than a single hole in my lobes, all the others are gone. I regret losing the tongue the most.
  • If I could pull off a pixie haircut I would in a second. I hate hair – seems like such a waste of time and resources.

Whoorl me, Moosh!

How perfect that I just start reading Moosh In Indy with this very funny post that won her some serious moola!  Now, she has partnered with the lovely and talented Whoorl to make the world a better place with pretty hair.  I’ve been reading Whoorl for awhile (and of course am now reading Hair Thursday as well) and I know need some serious help but she’s got like a billion people in waiting…what’s a girl to do?  How about post my entire hair history for the world to see in hopes of winning a fabulous, Whoorl-selected and Moosh-funded hair make-over?  Here goes…

I have THICK, straight hair.  It is so thick and unruly my mom kept it short so I rocked the Dorothoy Hamill cut from about birth to 7th or 8th grade when I started caring about my hair.

During that time my mom sometimes experimented with perms – home perms (how I loathed you, Toni!) and in my thick, curl-resistant hair they lasted about a month.  I can’t even tell you how many times I sat in a kitchen chair while my mom tightly rolled all my massive amounts of hair on dozens of rollers so I could sit with stinky chemicals on hair and my head rapped in a plastic bag.  It’s amazing I have any hair left after the punishment I put it through.

gotta love the mullet

In middle school I thought a “professional perm” would last longer so I saved my babysitting money for months to get a salon perm and I thought I looked RAD.  Let’s not talk about the chemical burns I got on my forehead and scalp – they were healed by time I posed for this:

Then the 1990’s and high school came a long and as a two-sport athlete hair just got in the way.  I hated styling it since it never held (my curing iron was covered in purple Aussie hairspray residue) and it was so thick I was always hot.  My thick, heavy hair laughed at ponytail holders and broke free most days.  So, I ended up with basically a Dorthoy Hamill cut again, but this time with an at-home-dye-job:

note how the eyebrows don’t even remotely match the hair

College came and I was every color in the book:  I tried black with a bleached streak in the front which looked like a skunk when pulled back into the almost daily ponytail.  It was super-short, shoulder length, middle of the back long; bobs, straight cuts, bangs, no bangs.  From kool-aid dye jobs and manic-panic to double process salon coloring, basically I tried it all:

The belt, the bangs, the blond, Oh my!

hungover and home for Easter – could my eyes look any glassier?

Ahh, keg parties – how I don’t miss you!

here I am posing with my Grandpa the Senator (on the right) and the State Auditor, I have a turtleneck on because I had HICKEYS all over my neck – I was mortified!

Again with the dark eyebrows and light hair – how did I not notice this?

I remember thinking I was sooo cute when this was taken

me and my wonderful hubby in Vancouver on what would be the trip when we got engaged – just days after college graduation (circa 1999)

one year later on our wedding day

After college I went through some crazy hair – a lot o f very bad, very short cuts.  Then I would start to grow it out and get sick of it and cut it off again.

I grew the back out to the flippy style that was popular in about 2001-02

ugh! bad, bad hair!

Once again on the long road to a grow-out (2005)

I usually come back to a bob of some sort.  Lengths vary, but I haven’t had bangs in years, I kind of want them but haven’t yet make that leap.  What I do know is that my hair takes close to an hour to dry with a hairdryer, so I try to wash it at night; this usually backfires as I try to sleep in the next morning and leave precious little time to do any styling.  It doesn’t hold a curl so I don’t even try anymore.  I spent nearly an hour executing the perfect Whoorl Curl only to have it fall straight within 2 hours – sob!!!  The times I really make an effort are in the weeks post-cut when I’m excited about my new ‘do – I’ll even straight iron in the mornings!

These are before and after pictures from last summer when I had 10 inches lopped off for Locks of Love.  I loved the shorter cut and it’s about as close to a good hair day I’ve had in the recent past, but it’s still the same old cut I always return to.  I also really like my hair in this family picture from last summer, pre-haircut, but it hardly ever looked that that.  I remember spending about 1 1/2 hours getting it to that look.

(family photo by the awesomely talented Ron Cowie)

This is me on a typical day…right now it’s just below my shoulders, air dried with very little styling.  Usually by noon it’s in a low ponytail because I can’t stand it on my neck.  I keep a pack of super-duty XL ponytail holders in my desk for this purpose:

Help me!!

I Just Don’t Get It

Sometimes the blog world baffles me.  Anyone who blogs, especially about their life and their kids, needs to understand that by putting something “out there” you are inviting the world to comment on it.  In the mommy-blogging world people can get downright bitchy, especially if you happen to post a different viewpoint.  Now, I’m not talking about the trolls that start bashing every little thing (like on ParentDish – gees that can be a wicked place)…I’m talking about mostly joyful places when you comment in a nice way but then get bashed by other commenters for having a differing view.  

Case in point – I commented on Amalah’s recent post about having an awful time with an over-stimulated toddler at an overly-expensive Thomas the Train event.  In the past Amalah has also written about dumping a ton of money on every Thomas the Train playset know to man even though her son never really plays with them. So, after reading about 25 comments from others recalling having the same miserable time at similar TV-show-themed events with cranky and overloaded kids my comment was this: “Sorry, I just don’t get outlaying that much cash for a 2 year old to see a train. Just like I don’t get paying tons of cash to get tix to a Hanna Montana concert for your 5 year old. Does any kid or parent actually enjoy this stuff?  Noah would have had the same enjoyment in the Thomas section of Toys R Us and you could have saved $$. Does make a good blog post, though.” 

And I get return comments like this from commenter Sarey: “Wow, ikate has forgotten how to play. why would you go to a concert or a play or any experience that isn’t in front of a tv?”  I guess what Sarey doesn’t know is that Thomas is a TV SHOW(!) and what I am suggesting, especially for the two-year old set, is why do they watch so much TV that they get so obsessed with a character?  And why do parents feel the need to outlay that kind of cash for a kid who would know no different from going to see a (free) train yard..or even a commuter train?  Why does a great experience for a child have to involve some marketed character? My guess is that any child obsessed with trains would be flipping out and “screaming and squealing with total kid joy” (which is why Amalah said she did it and would do it again).  Commenter Cagey hit the nail on the head with “We have two major rail lines running through our town and we go to watch the trains running by about every other day. My kid still goes spastic every single time we see a train coming through..” but then still managed to slam me by the end of her comment.  

And, of course  you wouldn’t get this from my short comment, but the reason I included the Hannah Montana part is because right after we moved to Cleveland she was performing here and there was a photo of a father with his 3-year old at the concert.  He “just had to get her the tickets” when he found out she was performing here…sounds to me like dad was the one who wanted to see HM perform, because I seriously doubt a 3-year old would know the concert schedule.  

I guess what I’m getting at are two points:  One being that I don’t get the backlash from other commenters on a blog when you post a dissenting viewpoint.  I’ve been reading Amalah for over two years now and in the last year or so her commenters treat her like a goddess who cannot be disagreed with so I hardly ever comment there – even if I agree or liked a post.  Sites like Ask Moxie are blissfully bitch free so I know it can be done, but it’s pretty rare.

Second is that I just don’t get the consumerism we heap onto our little ones.  It’s one thing to visit American Girl for a tea party when a 7-8 year old has been reading the books for a year or two and will remember the special day; or to see HM with a school-age child who knows every word to her songs.  It’s another thing altogether to spend an entire day with a tantruming, screaming 2-year old because you get 2 minutes of joy from the nearly $70 you just shelled out for the experience.  There is so much lost in that exchange – it has become all about the parent being the “Best Parent in the World” and nothing about exploring a child’s wonder.

I Heart TAL

Is that that show by those hipster know-it-alls who talk about how fascinating ordinary people are?*
Yes, it is! 

I’m a huge fan of This American Life.  I love the show more than anything else when it comes to entertainment media.  I don’t often hear it on the radio since my new local NPR station doesn’t carry it (what the hell?) but do listen to the weekly shows via the podcast.  If you aren’t familiar with TAL and its host/creator, Ira Glass, it’s a really hard thing to describe.  The show tells unusual stories in unique ways…slice of life, fictional stories that are always so, so interesting. They can be touching, thoughtful, funny, and surprising; but they are always mesmerizing.  Each show has a bit of a theme running through it…in fact, the way Ira introduces each show is “of course each week we choose a theme, and bring you a variety of stories on that theme..” He has a great skill in weaving the stories and interviews with fantastic music and pacing them with a perfect cadence.  The show is simple, beautiful and transcendent storytelling and is next to impossible to explain.  So just go listen to an episode or two…I’ll wait. 

Last year, TAL did a TV show for Showtime and I wondered for weeks how in the world they could translate the unique quality of a radio show to a visual media without losing what makes the show so special.  We got Showtime precisely so we could watch and somehow they pulled it off – what was on the screen was a perfect interpretation of the show we knew and loved.  Balanced, simple, beautiful storytelling now paired with stunning visuals allowed the success of the radio show to shine in a new format.  (BTW – TAL season 2 starts Sunday…get those TiVos set!).  Showtime must like it because TAL now has a contract for 30 shows.

Last night, based on the success of the radio show (1.7 million listeners each week and it’s always listed as one of the top weekly podcasts on the net) and the TV show, Ira and crew did something no other radio show has ever done – they did a live broadcast of its show to theaters across the country.  Of course, we attended at a nearby theater to see Ira on stage in NYC before a live audience talking about the radio and TV shows while playing clips and outtakes from the new TV season.  I was so excited all day yesterday and when I tried to explain it to co-workers I would get really strange looks.  It’s hard to believe that some people have never even heard of the show!

Anyway, we arrived and were pleasantly surprised to see about 60 or so other TAL dorks who shelled out the $20 per ticket.  As we settled in with our dinner of popcorn and soda the “pre-show puzzles” (a hang-man like game to fill the screen before the broadcast started) were up but audio from the usual pre-movie commercials and previews was playing.  Then, right at 8 PM Ira appears on the screen and there was no audio!  We missed the first 7 minutes of audio as the idiots at Regal Cinemas got their act together and fixed it.  It was a strange thing to see Ira on the screen talking into his mic but hear the audio of movie previews.  I was livid that we paid $40 to see this and Regal Cinemas failed so miserably.  However, once the problem was fixed Mark and I were quickly caught up in the show.  Ira seemed totally relaxed, the entire crew did a fantastic job with the live broadcast and we laughed and “oohed” fo the next two hours.  It was a terrific night out and I’m so glad I got to see it.  I can’t wait for the new TV season to start, but in the meantime I will get my fix with one of the over 300 radio shows that are already done.

*Bonus points you know what TV show this is from.

Boob Tube

A few questions for the Noggin Network* (with apologies to any reader who doesn’t have toddlers).

Little Bear
Why is Little Bear naked while Father Bear and Mother Bear are always decked out in elaborate three-piece suits and full gowns? 

What’s up with Uncle Rusty?  First, shouldn’t his name be “Uncle Bear” …how come he gets a proper name but no one else does?  Also, is he a swinger or something?  Why, when the other adult bears are in full, formal attire does he get to run around in bib overalls with no shirt and a kerchief around his neck?  Does he have a swingers party to attend later?

Since when does a bear need a fishing pole to catch a fish?

Emily is a bit of a controlling brat.

Where did Mitzi come from?  A monkey in the middle of the woods frolicking with bears and owls and ducks?  A cat is enough of a stretch, but a monkey – get real!

Max & Ruby
What parent in thier right mind would leave their child with Ruby?  Even if she is Max’s sister, she’s not all there.  Max hides behind a potted plant during hide and seek and Ruby can’t find him; she lets him take ice cream in the bathtub several times, creating a mess each time; she allows a toddler who only speaks a few words to go to the grocery store BY HIMSELF; she ignores him while she invites her own friends over to play, and she’s not bright enough to tell when Max has swapped out his monster toys for her dolls.  I don’t know about you, but those are all qualities I look for in a baby-sitter.  Besides, just where is their mother?  The only adult ever around is their grandmother.  If I had a daughter like Ruby I guess I would be hiding away somewhere boozing up, too.

Lazy Town
Um, WTF????

Oobi
Other than the annoying voices I kind of like this one

The Upside Down Show
For the love of god, please film some more episodes!  If I have to hear the “very hairy” song again or hear about the “shirsday smarty” one more time my ears are going to explode.  And why do David and Shane always have to be doing something FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME? 

I think I need a hobby.

*disclaimer – M really doesn’t watch that much TV, mostly just Sesame Street while we are preparing dinner.  Noggin does however make it’s way on the tube a couple of times a week when we are in need of some downtime.

Spring Sprung

Um…Hi!

Please forgive my lack of posting this week.  It is finally not gray and cold outside and we spent the majority of our free time during the last week frolicking in the out-of-doors.  It’s been a looooong winter and it’s been a blast watching M re-discover what awaits her outside.  She has already de-flowered all of the crocus in the yard, which is really my fault since I picked one to show it to her up close.  We found a small, child-sized rake in the garage of the new house and she busies herself “helping” clean out the flower beds. And the girl loves to dig in the dirt. She makes a bee-line for a patch of garden bed next to the garage as soon as she’s outside and settles down to dig, dig, dig.

As for walking, we have been taking daily family walks in the neighborhood.  We usually do this sans-stroller as M prefers to run free for the mile or so we walk.  The upside is that she gets totally worn out and sleeps like a champ for 12+ hours every night and her naps are up to 1 ½ – 3 hours.  The down side is that it can take forever and we end up carrying her a small part of the way.  Either way it means I have to do a little less time on the treadmill in the dark, boring basement.  Now that the weather has broken I hope to get outside for some post-bedtime walks just to break things up a little.

Finally, this weekend I had an uncontrollable urge to be a 1950s housewife, apparently.  I really wanted to bake some bread so I whipped up a nice loaf of cinnamon-swirl bread along with some standard white bread.  Both were made with ½ white flour and ½ whole wheat flour since I ran out of the white – oops!  The house smelled heavenly and the bread is fantastic.  Then, I had planned to do a lemon-garlic roast chicken but the nice weather (70 degrees!) was calling so I went to the park with the fam instead.  Oh well, I will roast the chicken later this week – I guess my quest to be the perfect homemaker fell a little short.  The fine patina of dog hair that covers everything in the house will also attest to this failure.

Silver Streak

Happy Birthday to my (much older) sister, JMH!!

…………….
As I think I mentioned before we were in the market for a new car.  The lease on my car was just about up and some car companies were having their “sign and drive” deals which means you could drive off with no out of pocket expenses.  Plus we both work for very large companies in Cleveland and they both have programs set up with several dealerships to get discounted pricing on new cars.  Perfect!

Now, I have to preface our car choice with the fact that I love station wagons – big, boxy station wagons.  Not some stupid scaled down SUV or hatch back car, but an honest-to-goodness wagon with seating for 5 and a big ol’ back end.  Since some time in high school, I knew that someday I would drive a wagon.  My ideal car would be an early 90s Volvo wagon, when they still had the very square back.  Not many car companies make these any more and since Ford bought Volvo I didn’t want to go there.  Subaru was on the list but I don’t need all the 4-wheel drive stuff.  Mercedes and Saab make them but I don’t make that kind of money.  I would have preferred to buy another GM but they don’t make what I want (although Saturn sells wagons in Europe – what’s up with that?). So we settled on the VW Passat Wagon.

The new ride is silver and very pretty and clean. I would have loved to have the mocha brown but we live in a climate where they use salt on the roads so dark cars are a bad idea. One of my favorite features are the built-in rear sunshades.  They are incorporated right into the door, so you don’t need any tinted film or those suction-cup shades to shield your preshus baby from the glaring rays of the sun anymore.  It’s a totally mama-mobile.

Anyway, we went to get our new car this weekend. Well, MY new car really. We headed to the dealership on Saturday morning and I drove it off the lot while Mark had M in his car; we stopped off at Costco and for lunch on the way home (yes – we are suburban hipsters. Wanna make something of it?).  Later in the afternoon Mark – having not driven the car at all yet – decided to take it out for a test spin.  About 20 minutes later he comes back, speeding ticket in hand.  He got busted for driving 60 mph in a 35 zone about 3 blocks from our house!  It’s a good thing we didn’t buy the Wii we saw Costco for his upcoming birthday …now he gets to pay off his ticket instead.  Happy birthday, honey!

He’s not allowed to drive my car anymore.  It may be a mama-mobile but it can haul ass!

Party Like It’s 1985

On Friday, forgetting that it’s spring break and that the mall would be overrun with teenagers and mother’s with their kids, I ran to the nearest mall to hit Sephora during my lunch. All the stroller dodging was worth it, though for the sight that awaited me as I walked in the mall entrance. I hope you have seen The Wedding Singer because I saw a kid, maybe 18 or 19, who looked like he was trying to be Sam – Adam Sandler’s sidekick in the movie, the guy who drives the limo (“They were cones!”). I kid you not he had the ‘stash, a mullet that was feathered on the sides and I swear to you he had a the red Michael Jackson Beat It jacket that was so popular in the early ‘80s. I stopped in my tracks trying to figure out if he was for real; and unfortunately I think he was.

Then, as I crossed through Nordstroms there was a display of young men’s fashion for the spring which included an outfit with light blue jeans, a pink polo shirt and a white sport jacket WITH THE SLEEVES ROLLED UP! The mannequin just needed the stubble beard and it could have been Crockett from Miami Vice. Please, please tell me that this “style” is not coming back. Or maybe tell me it is, because I enjoy laughing at these people.

…………….

Walking news: 2x 3 miles over the past week with a 4 mile today. A bit off pace, but better than last week!

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